Repulsive

In a struggle to settle

An equation of

Forces those repel, yet attract towards

With different

Integers, variables, so much co-efficient

Doesn’t see a way that I get anywhere

Near the answer

That a heart would understand

In a yellowish room

With a tinted lampshade

Aroma + smoke fragrance

Mixed with reddish Lejay cassis

You made me realize

It`s a parallel path to infinity

That wouldn’t comply

With my equation….

Climb of the life

I didn’t look at it from the beginning
But just the image I had in the mind
Yet it`s worth climbing
To see how high the life is

Step by Step, I felt the roughness
Piercing my heals, yet kept climbing
Walk that not balance, just like the life

If it`s steep just slow down, remembered
To pick up the pace again
Exhausted lungs cry for a break
Pounding heart would say you to stop
Determined mind would, decide when to

Stones are cold, just like some people
Had to find, strength to fight my fears
Lay down on ground
Thinking the summit would be warm

Mates would leave, I will be left
Fear, loneliness & uncertainty
Would sink, deep in to my heart
No supporting ropes, no protection poles
Make me appreciate, what I had
Mist and the dark would keep me company
Shivers in cold would say
That I`m alive

Inhale deep
Cut across the path, laid for me
Find my own, know that I dare
Jump from rock to another, let me miss it
Remember the path
Let instinct tell
Which would hold me
When I slip

Be sure
You see the rays, of your effort
Start feeling, heart will pump
Twice as it can
Thus you will run
The climb
The most difficult part of your life
While others walk….

I would tell you...

If I would hold you

One day

Cuddle you in my hand

I will kiss your forehead and

Tell you this

Story of a father to a son

Who would conquer the world

For me...!!

The lessons of my life

Lessons no one would dare to tell you

Lessons no one would ever have

Coz no one would take the same path, I did

Darkest hours of life time

You won’t even see your shadow with you

But just know, just believe

You yourself will be the only thing with you there...!!

You will find unfairness

Of the world, words and smiles

Know those are fake

know you are in the right path

And your heart tells what is right

Stand up and fight for them

Fell down, put down both palms on ground

Get back up on your feet…!!

You will find you are no longer in the inner circle

Be hurt, be thoughtful

Make your own circle

Widen its dimensions, and your heart

Those inner circles would wanted to become

Your innermost circles

When they feel they are in the

Outer circle…!!

You will find everything is so empty

No shoulder to sob on

There will be a time

Your shoulders will be asked

To be sobbed

Be there, for them

Know that you are not empty

It’s just the surrounding is empty…!!

Loved ones would leave you

Cheat you, hurt you and blame you

Sit out in the cold shivering for hours  

To see their face for a one last time

Before you look away

It is your heart what matters

Thus know them for who they are in real

Yet love them limitlessly in your heart..!!

Look out through the spring leaves

Comfort your eyes

Let them shine with the greenish

Let go the bloody autumn

Take its sorrows, wipe it clean

Shiver in white snow

Thus you will know

What it means to be warm….!!!!!

Envy You..

You seemed to have read a lot
And talked a lot
For the people
You cared

You seemed to have endure a lot
Warm hearts and successful smiles
And I am sure
Rejection, betrayal & disappointment
Were there too

I wish if you could’ve
Hold me and teach me
How you survived like this
Without any expression
Even when freezing pile of
Snow on your head

I know time will teach me
But I miss been hold or
Some nice words
At least to tell me you remember..

I know time will guide me
But I will become frozen and darken
Coz it will ease the pain
Comes from harsh human hearts

I know I will envy you
Coz there won’t be anyone
Who'd see you like I do
And to say a word of appreciation
But I’d still become stoned
Like you
The easy way out…

You There..?

Every one says you handle everything
our beat of the heart
fading colours of the sky
droplets of rain fall on us on times when we never imagine
shining upon us in a moment, saying it’s gonna be a brighter day
they say it’s all you…..

You control the seasons
you control the beautiful colours
what I’ve been seen here for so long
the songs of the birds
the smiles I see on faces
and their tears….

I’ve always believed
that you are fair
I’ve heard that you test our endurance
and I believed that you push the
courageous souls forward
not leaving behind the souls need your help…..

I believed that
if I prove you that
if I didn’t give up
you will be always shining on me……

I took all the hard times
with a smile in my face
I may have cried
till that tears become smile
but why I just cant find you now
why I am missing you
in my life….

But you, who lives above us all
I am  tired
I am broke
may be I need a break
please take my soul with you
please know this is my limit
you  won’t get anything
just by testing
what I have made up of
coz it’s human blood and flesh…...

No point of testing me any more
No point me feeling bad that I’ve failed you
So please take me in to your wings
Let me rest
In peace if possible…..

At least please let me know that you are there….

Gone Away

You were there
always
holding hands
time to go
said you
okey then
what else can I say
even if I would ask
not to leave so much shinny waves
on your way away
to shake me vigorously
would you listen..

The More..

The more we find the easy way,
the path of least resistance,
the more we just fallow your desire,
the more our minds become
Sloppy, Headless....

The more I try to look at that
bright light,
the more I try to walk there,
the more I try to get you there,
with me,
away from this dark,
that we are,
The more I get drown,
in to thick black sorrows....